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| 07:17pm 16/05/2008 |
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music: Scream at the Walls - 10 Years (division)
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Someone posed a question to me the other day. She asked me what type of woman I prefer. I told her I like "dark haired women that are pretty, but not to pretty, and have deep seated feelings of abandonment and constantly seek validation by dating down." Some how she found that insulting, and completely regretted asking the question. If I, instead, said someone with a nice rack and a heart-shaped ass, would that have been more acceptable? Personally I think that sounds more degrading, but that's just me. It's not like I'm aiming too high. Being realistic doesn't make me a bad person. |
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Comments: \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 01:47am 16/10/2007 |
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god, there's a lot more crap on here now when I log in. What's with the questions? Just letting anyone who still actually has my lj on their friends page know I'm still living. OH, yeah, my eldest brother just got married recently...a couple weeks back, actually. It was fun, got y freak on with a couple bridesmaids...yeah even I can smell the bullshit coming from htat but let me dream. Things are a bit sticky right now. My job still sucks ass and I'm on thin ice because I hurt the feelings of a manager...who's not even there now. Yeah, I couldn't hold out another couple weeks. My mom was let go from her job too. That's just incredibly crappy for both of us. It's sad when I'm the only one with an income and I can barely afford utilities with the peanuts I make. So it's kinda tight around here and it's absolutely killing me because I can't by any new anime to distract me from my sad and boring life. Plus I have no time to myself. I'm still in school. yeah, don't ask. well, this is october so I'm guessing the next post will be in...march. Give or take three months. |
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Comments: 1 §äç®ífçë - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| Another year gone |
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| 11:01pm 03/05/2007 |
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mood:  exhausted music: Paranoid Android (radiohead)/Sleepwalking Elite (Chevelle)
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I just finished with finals today. It was a very long day. I think I put in about twelve hours between actual test time and study in between. Fun times I'm sure. My flash project went well. I'm planning on getting a new laptop tomorrow, a nice gateway. Good graphics, decent amount of ram, lots of memory. I'll more than likely buy programs through school as I get the chance. There's a nice little hundred dollar package with flash and dream weaver. Photo shop is pretty expensive, about 219 or so. Illustrator is a little cheaper. That's about all I'd need for my own diversions. I'd love to expand on what I've learned in flash. Fun stuff, I made some nifty little movies, and if you put illustrator and flash together you can do some amazing things. It's kinda depressing though. My prof I've had these classes with the past year and a half is leaving so nobody will be teaching those classes anymore. He got a great offer for a design position.
My current anime suggestions are the new version of Guyver (if you loved the old one you'll love this one), Ergo Proxy (Re'l is kind of a bitch after the first volume but it's a fascinating anime and the music is great, they use paranoid android as the ending theme), if you love hellsing then get the newly released OVA, it's worth it. That's my recomendation for anyone who is into that sorta stuff. Maybe if you guys are lucky and I'm not too lazy I'll put online one of my flash projects to veiw. OH btw, if you like chevelle, GET the new album, it may be their best yet, I haven't decided. |
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| Kratos is my Idol |
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| 02:39am 01/08/2006 |
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I bought God of War the other day on a whim. I'm fairly happy I did. It is definately worth it. It has my seal of approval. I mean yeah, there's gross inacuracies between geography and mythology...but fuck you for bitching about it. The story is great. I mean really. It's a game where the ultimate goal is to "murder" a god. How cool is that. The best part is that from what I've seen in the game to this point, they actually pull it off without horribly fucking it up. Yeah a technical term. It's bloody, violent, and you even get the chance to set a guy on fire simply because shit, I need to get through that door over your dead body. Then there's the nudity. The women in this game were designed with great sets of polygons and half of them sure as hell are not afraid to show them. I mean really, and I don't mind telling you this because it's toward the begining of the game before going into athens, Kratos is allowed a breif minigame you can do as many times as you want that's a quicky with two greek women. lmfao, the objective is to satisfy them enough that the vase on the bedpost breaks from the fun. HAHAHAHAHA!!! Anyway, great game. If you like violent games with nudity and of course a genuinely fascinating plot, then buy God of War. Shit, it's only twenty dollars, or less if you catch a sale. |
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Comments: 6 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| Awake. |
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| 08:10pm 20/07/2006 |
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I have some interesting news to report yet the problem is I'm under a verbal non-disclosure agreement until the public is warned. Otherwise I would, but even though I've pretty much whipped a lot of myself out of this journal I've still got a ways to go before anonymity. Oh, once school starts back up I'll probably update my background and icons with some of my latest design work. These are pieces I put a lot of time into that I'm planning to use, so if anyone is actually willing to check-out my lj in the future Watch for that. I do plan to post in this a little more than just a mere couple times a year. I've been urged to use my space but I'm still rather resistant. Plus I hardly have time to set up an account and a page.
In other news I managed to get tickets to see korn and deftones as a diversion in a couple months. (Tickets were really cheap.) Speaking of music I actually bought a MP3 player. It's a Zen Nano. Not much to it, but it's a gig plus fm radio which is more than enough, and for 60-70 bucks it's pretty sweet compared to spending a couple hundred for a 1 gig I-pod or something else. I'm refining the playlist but it's slowly turning into my ultimate complilation. (of course it's loaded with tool) I swear, I've turned into an anime whore. I'm up to about 18 series. I suppose if you add up what I've spent the last two and a half years it's about if not over a thousand dollars in anime. Lol it's all displayed on a growing wall. Yet it's sad to me that I'm a volume away from running out of desirable shows. |
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Comments: 1 §äç®ífçë - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 10,000 Days are up. |
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| 01:52pm 01/05/2006 |
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"I need to watch things Die/ From a good safe distance/ Vicariously I/ live while the whole world dies/ And everyone feels the same as I/ So why don't we just admit it..."
Surprised I didn't post earlier? So am I. Damn I'm so excited about the new TOOL album. Vicarious gives much hope this time. It's their progressively evolving sound from Lateralus mixed with the emotion of previous albums like Aenima and conveys disturbing undertones. I fucking love it! It's TOOL AGAIN! Lol it's sad but I'm going to try and get over to Best Buy early tomorrow morning in order to secure a copy before they sell out, unlike with advent children. Yes, I bought FFVII Advent Children, and loved it, but I had to wait until their next shipment to get it because the entire area sold out of it by noon. Anyway I just hope this time around I can actually get to see Tool in concert when they come through. BTW Finals week, yay me, I'm always posting at stressful and inconvenient times. |
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| bored...like always, get used to it. |
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| 01:12am 30/03/2006 |
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music: Stabbing Westward- Save Yourself
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1. I've actually used the whole art class excuse to get a girl naked...even though the truth was I just needed a picture of her face for a stock photo.
2. I've said things in the past couple weeks I don't regret saying that I should.
3. I wear black leather pants to make people think I'm dark and brooding and just a little bit wild.
4. I really am trying to get into the Dick Cheney fan club in hopes of a chance to shoot an old man with bird shot and get away with it.
5. I don't actually like people. I "tolerate" their existances.
6. I was in a regional boy choir when I was in grade school.
7. I've tried teaching people how to tie a tie but never succeeded.
8. My middle name is actually Merry.
9. The only bone I've come close to breaking was a chip fracture to my pinky toe from someone tripping me as I went to bash someone else with a pillow when I was younger.
10. The most experience I have with drugs is just a little pot smoking as a teen.
11. I'm in love with a woman who is a loosly practicing muslim but is as americanized as you get, and has a "butt that won't quit."
12. I was recently caught staring at a woman's thong in class as she was leaning forward in her chair.
Right so this is what I posted last time, So what's real? Welll...I won't say everything...unless the right questions are asked, but here it goes.
1. I'm actually too ethical to use such and excuse to get a woman naked so nope.
2. Hell, who hasn't?
3. You'd have to kill me and redress my corpse to get me to wear anything leather besides boots.
4. Come on! How many of you can honestly say if given the chance to get away with it you wouldn't fire birdshot in some old bastard republican's face?
5. Come to think of it, this one is borderline. I don't deny and have actually said repeatedly that I'm a misanthrope.
6. lmfao, judge this one for yourself.
7. I've meantioned this in a previous post. Those "teens" I work with are complete dunces.
8. Not my middle name. It's actually incredibly easy to guess because it's so fucking common.
9. As stupid as it was, true... that's all.
10. That's everyone's story. I went to what was considered the most ghetto high school in the area so hey, what else is new?
11. Bullshit, but I do work with someone who's a loosly practicing muslim. She's such a damn stereotypical teen girl is kills me. Her butt is not that great and don't tell her I said this, but she kinda resemmbles gadget from Chip & Dale's Rescue Rangers. lmfao.
12. Already admitted to this. Oddly enough this woman did have a great ass and she may be middle-eastern in descent.
You know, I've been listening to a lot of stabbing westward lately. Seriously, if you've had a bad break-up recently I seriously recomend getting one of their CDs. "I know your life is empty and you hate to face this world alone. You're searching for an angel. Someone who can make you whole. I can not save you. I can't even save myself, so just save yourself." Love that song. It's so damn blunt. My point was if you don't feel like buying all the CDs then just get the essential stabbing westward. Either way, it's good to listen to even if you don't have a fucked over love life to bitch about.
Btw, I'm hoping that sooner or later a friend of mine from work will e-mail me a copy the outline for a speech he gave on cannibalism. (mind you it's pro cannibalism) He was describing this speech and I just loved the idea. It seemed rather well thought out. He used human bodies in a context of a comodity and potential end to world hunger. I just really want to see the outline for this. If it's really that interesting I'll post it. |
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Comments: 2 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 01:51am 28/02/2006 |
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mood:  devious music: Taproot- Smile
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Ok so I've been making shameless, almost nonexistant inuendo and flirtatious comments to random people and the girl stuck her tongue in my ear. Wtf? Oops, didn't mean to specify. Oh well. Anyway. The cattle of the city I reside in are annoying me more than ever these days. I'm sure if it wasn't for the tongue in my ear and teddybear comments I'm sure I'd be genocidal.
So I have one question for people out there. Why can't I escape conversations about cartoons and sex? I turned on the radio early this afternoon and what do I hear? They're having call-ins about what cartoon character would you "do" and why. I nearly hit a tree when some woman said squidward for his nose because you wouldn't even have to look at him and still have a good time. Absolutely horrid.
More fun "facts" about DCB.
1. I've actually used the whole art class excuse to get a girl naked...even though the truth was I just needed a picture of her face for a stock photo.
2. I've said things in the past couple weeks I don't regret saying that I should.
3. I wear black leather pants to make people think I'm dark and brooding and just a little bit wild.
4. I really am trying to get into the Dick Cheney fan club in hopes of a chance to shoot an old man with bird shot and get away with it.
5. I don't actually like people. I "tolerate" their existances.
6. I was in a regional boy choir when I was in grade school.
7. I've tried teaching people how to tie a tie but never succeeded.
8. My middle name is actually Merry.
9. The only bone I've come close to breaking was a chip fracture to my pinky toe from someone tripping me as I went to bash someone else with a pillow when I was younger.
10. The most experience I have with drugs is just a little pot smoking as a teen.
11. I'm in love with a woman who is a loosly practicing muslim but is as americanized as you get, and has a "butt that won't quit."
12. I was recently caught staring at a woman's thong in class as she was leaning forward in her chair.
Stay tuned and maybe you'll find out the truth someday.
Anybody else notice that I've gone through and erased most identifying marks from my lj as to who I am? Kinda funny my paranoia huh. Speaking of paranoia. My spotlight today is on an anime called paranoia agent. This little freak show has the most fucked up and twisted plot of anything I've ever seen. Just about every episode becomes an almost law and order account of each new victum of Shonen bat or little slugger with little focus on the police investigating it. I can't say too much because it's really something you have to see or yourself. Don't worry it's only 13 episodes but it'll leave you scratching your head raw and bloody trying to figure out what the real truth is? Paranoid delusion or stand alone complex? That's the question. (or is it?) See it yourself and find your own answer, damnit, because I don't just fucking hand them out like candy. |
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Comments: 2 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 01:13am 06/02/2006 |
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mood:  blah music: Taproot- Facepeeler
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Sweet words I'll never hear and a storm gathering on the horizon already sending lightening across the path... There's a reason I hardly post anymore. There's really nothing interesting in my life. Well that's if you don't count the fact that my brother screwed up again and is in jail...AGAIN. Ironically just a day or so after finding out he made the Dean's list for his grades. I won't go into any details. I have none. MY life is still a joke so nothing to catch up on. Still secretly lusting after forbiden fruit, and desperately attempting to free myself from slavery and educational systems. I'm still an asshole yet a little wiser and more cynical. I have a nephew now. He's fairly mellow. I don't think that comes from either side; it's a fluke. My mother's friend is staying with us temporarily as well. It's until her divorce is finalized and she can plan out a new living space. My anime collection is still growing even though I'm more poor than ever. I mean it's been about a month now since classes started and I still haven't purchased all of the required texts. There are still people trying to get me drunk, although I suppose that will never end. Well, anyone who's still out there and actually reading this, drop me a comment, let me know someone is still alive...or that I'm dead. Which ever comes first. |
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Comments: 8 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 07:38pm 12/11/2005 |
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Gantz is fucked up, yet somehow compeling. All that violence and nudity...and for once there actually is an interesting plot behind it. Seriously, it's fucked up. |
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| This post has no real direction, makes you wonder about the writer. |
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| 10:50pm 09/09/2005 |
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lmfao, I'm now that geek that walks around with his flash drives and is the only guy you see using the Macs in the computer lab. The twist is I'm just using it to play with the phoyoshop program for a class, same for the flash drives. Lol It still doesn't excuse it. I'll say one thing, it is kinda nice to be taking a course that's entirely computer lab time without the rest of my class spitting on me like in the AutoCAD class I took my senior year of high school four years ago. Before that though enters the head of any self-loathing masochist forcing his/herself to read this....Yes I realize that makes me old now and it still sucks, but at least I can get trashed in a socially acceptable manner without getting arrested for age restrictions. btw, if I produce anything worthwhile I'll post it on here. So far nothing really interesting. Speaking of drinking...A guy I work with made a mention in the breakroom about going to all the clubs on his b-day yesterday. A grocery worker mentioned that he goes all the time with his hawaiian shirt and gold chains, to which I mentioned with deeper sarcasm about spiking my hair and dressing up in glam goth gear. Odd thing is I think they believed me. Guess that's what happens when you make and effort to misdirect your coworkers on who you are so they really have no clue, just possible clues through random stories. Either way it's kinda fun. It's not like any of them are going to follow me out of the store. There's one I might follow just so I can find the perfect time to kill him....wait! You weren't supposed to see that. Idol banture can get you arrested for terrorism these days. I'll edit that before I post this. |
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| 09:51pm 05/09/2005 |
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I'm sick of school and my job, even if they did give me a quarter raise. I'm sick of my comp as well, because once again it's fucked up. There's adware on my comp that I can't get rid of. I keept trying and it keeps coming back. Can't seem to find the source. It's pissing me off because everytime I get my browser going it tried to install this damn spyware guard into my comp. How ironic is that? I hate school, I'm bored with it, I'm sick of it, I don't like my profs. My prof for my computer class looks like a younger david letterman but he's not really funny and kind of an ass, not in the fun way that david letterman is. My personality prof isn't bad, he seems fairly workable. I still dislike foreign language classes. My experimental psych class is kinda chrusty. The prof is hot though, that's a plus. There's still that paper though. Bleh. Oh well, doesn't sound too bad yet. I think it's supposed to be a proposal that may end up getting submitted. Who knows...but the prof is hott though. Did I meantion that? |
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| 11:22pm 23/08/2005 |
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mood:  stressed
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Apparently my old cs/aol sn gungnirEMD now works solely as an AIM sn. Weird huh. I went to check on my old space through CS's Our World and had to go through an address change on my old sn before I could access my pics on there. I changed the info and it said, "Sorry to lose you as an AOL member, but we appreciate you continuing to use aol.com service (free of charge)." blah blah, you get the point. Anyway, for all of you wanting money, I'm officially poor. I just had to put out like 500 for books and I still have one more to go that wasn't in stock. All my accounts are pretty much tapped out as much as I'm going to allow. (I need what's left for incase of emergency, e.i.:Making bail, Car trouble/accident, surprise medical bills, etc.. The rest of my family doesn't get that even though it's come in handy for two of those situations so far and I'm not emptying it so easily.) The problem is I still have too much to go, which pisses me off. Wednesdays are when I got to meet up with some friends and watch anime. (yes, I said friends you skeptical bastards) Why is it a problem? Well I'm already over half way down and it's a 60 mile drive round trip. I can't afford gas until friday and this is the last wednesday I'll be able to manage this because the fall semester starts monday and wednesdays I will be gone all day for class and work. It all just blows severe chunks. Smelly chunks. Smelly green chunks. You get the point. Just pissed as hell right now and broke. I fucking hate being a responsible adult. |
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Comments: 2 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 08:16pm 14/08/2005 |
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"Everything in this room is edible..." "...Even me, but that, Children, is cannibalism and is considered morally wrong in most every society."
Lmfao, somehow that cannibalism remark in the movie just cracked me up to an unual amount. The movie itself wasn't too bad. He wasn't as michael Jacksonish as everyone made him out to be. I didn't see the touchy gropy look in his eye when looking at the kids. I was entertained none the less. The puppet thing was just creepy but still entertaining. Anyway I just got back from this still fairly new icecream place that showed up last summer or so. Cold Stone Ice Creamery or something. Now before I go into it, you have to understand something. For some reason this morning when I got up I yawned and something very painful happened to my jaw. It was like getting a charlie horse in one side of your face. Fucking hurts to eat and sometimes speak. Totally fucked up. I swear that's never happened before. (Maybe it was that amish bitch...) So basically chewing is agony. With that in mind the excruciating pain it took to open my mouth enough to spoon in the dessert I got from that place was worth it. The shit was some of the best icecream I've ever had. I swear to god standing there looking at the menu and all the crap they had I felt like a fat kid in an icecream shoppe...oddly enough it's because I WAS! ...anyway... Enough Me-bashing but it was rather good in spite of my agonizing pain in my jaw. Btw, anyone have any ideas on what might be causing this? It's only the left side of my jaw. Feels like when I had my wisdom teeth out on that side. Just fucking hurt like a baseball bat to the jaw everytime. |
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Comments: 2 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 09:57pm 01/08/2005 |
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Here's a quick question for any female who may read this:
When a woman tells you, "You look just/(a lot) like my ex boyfriend/(someone I dated)." Does she really believe that this is a compliment? Seriously, I've had women say this to me a lot, and it really kind of annoys me. You see, what I really hear is, "You look like someone I'd reject in a heartbeat for petty reasons like looking like someone I don't like." |
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Comments: 7 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 10:24pm 31/07/2005 |
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the Cutting Edge
(56% dark, 56% spontaneous, 38% vulgar) |
your humor style:
CLEAN | SPONTANEOUS | DARK
Your humor's mostly innocent and off-the-cuff, but somehow there's something slightly menacing about you. Part of your humor is making people a little uncomfortable, even if the things you say aren't in and of themselves confrontational. You probably have a very dry delivery, or are seriously over-the-top. Your type is the most likely to appreciate a good insult and/or broken bone and/or very very fat person dancing.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU: David Letterman - John Belushi |
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My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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You scored higher than 47% on dark |
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You scored higher than 77% on spontaneous |
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You scored higher than 66% on vulgar |
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Comments: \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| guess what. |
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| 11:35pm 04/07/2005 |
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"I want to fuck my way to the garden
Beacause everyone needs a mother, FUCKER!
And now, more fun facts about DCB.
1. I like 80s love and glam rock ballads.
2. Twenty-two is not only my age but my "height."
3. The day of my birthday is also the same day which celebrates the invention of the gatling gun.
4. I cried at the end of Christine when the car was destroyed...and also at the end of The English Patient and the series finale of Friends.
5. At times I'm a compulsive hair puller, but nobody ever notices because the place I pluck hair from isn't visible.
6. I actually watched a little over two full seasons of Sailor Moon and lie that I've only watched an episode partially and was incredibly annoyed by it.
7. I'm still a bit of a pyromaniac.
8. I lie about a lot of things to seem more complex.
9. I actually raced a minivan and lost.
10. I can find nearly any woman attractive and still believe I have dignity.
That concludes another exciting episode of fun facts about DCB. Tune in next time and maybe I'll tell you which ones are real.
Ok so I decided not to go for that job because I don't think I could manage a school shcedule around just night classes. I'm still absolutely hating my job. I'm actually more of a misanthrope. I didn't think it possible, but it's true. People are just plain stupid and lazy slobs. Filthy little things. Kinda like the women's bathroom. |
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Comments: 7 §äç®ífçës - \/\/ø®§híþ~Ñøthíñg.
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| 11:24pm 21/06/2005 |
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"Sometimes I like to sit on my hand til it's numb then masturbate with it. I call it the stranger."
~Dave Chappelle as Lil' Jon.
It seems an opportunity has opened in my direction. I just heard from my mom that my brother told her about an opening where he works. It would be working Monday through Friday, no weekends, at either 7am-3:30pm or 6am-2:30pm. I'd probably start out making what I am now and after like 90 days probation I could make like a dollar more or something...possibly. I don't entirely know what the job would entail, just that it's in Parts. Sounds like just a manual labor job or some shit. The words he told my mom was to ask me, "How would you like to get a real job?" If I ended up doing that I'd only be able to take night classes, I'd be screwed on anything that would only be offered in the mornings. Currently I'd have to redo my entire schedule. There's a lot of questions I have before I even think about applying. Who knows. Hey, on the plus side it sounds like I'd be full time and making more. It's just I don't have a clue what it is. |
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| interesting? nah.... |
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| 10:12pm 18/06/2005 |
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music: Mudvayne- All That You Are
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Ok, I have a odd little request for everyone. IT's pretty easy, and kinda disturbing at the same time. First, just picture yourself as you are, you're daily life, a usual day. You know, the regular stuff. Everything that makes up your life. Ok, now picture all of that, but this time as a porno. How strange would your life be with everything you do, all the places you go, all the people you see or meet on the street or in a store be if suddenly it was a porno? Less dialogue and more "dialogue." Seriously, think about that. Then type what your first thought is. Mine was. "Oh god, my life is a porno and I'm still not getting any!" |
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xxcynicalxx's journal